


fan favorite phyllis the cat

by michaelnatural (calebwidogast)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fluff, M/M, canon divergent: this is the good spn in my head., no beta reading we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-18 16:33:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,062
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28995297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/calebwidogast/pseuds/michaelnatural
Summary: cas brings home a surprise.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 10
Kudos: 59





	fan favorite phyllis the cat

“what,” dean asks, eyeing the cat carrier sitting with its door open, “the fuck is that.”

cas shoots him  _ that _ look, his eyes narrowing and his lip pulling into the faintest hint of a sneer that says ‘really?’. dean is entirely too familiar with the look, so it only phases him a little as cas says, “her name is phyllis.”

“her n- okay. okay. it- she’s a cat, right? just so we’re on the same- so we’re in the same book.” dean says, because this pink hairless  _ blob _ isn’t really saying cat to him, but it’s the only thing it could be.

cas rolls his eyes and dean can’t help that his lips nearly twitch into a smile, but he locks it down. cas answers him, “of course she is, dean.” he turns back to the carrier he’s crouching a few feet away from, watching her peer out. “she’s been at the shelter for a few weeks and-”

“you know i’m allergic to cats, right?” dean reminds him.

cas cocks one impatient eyebrow. “you’re allergic to cat hair. i have to assume you can tell that phyllis is hairless.”

dean drags a hand down his face. “yeah, i- yeah. does that count as a cat?”

“dean, you’re being difficult.” cas says.

“okay, alright. but i don’t like cats. you know that.” dean adds.

cas levels him with another look. “i know that you’ve never had one, and you’re holding a grudge because one frightened you-”

“i’m going to strangle sam if he tells anyone else that story.” dean groans.

cas cracks a smile, the kind that dean can only see in his eyes. “anyways. i’ve been reading a book about cat care. did you know that when cats blink very slowly or close their eyes around a person, it shows that they trust them? phyllis is apparently very fond of me.”

dean says, “well,” to agree and then realizes that means he’s agreeing with a hairless cat. a hairless cat that, until four minutes ago, dean didn’t know existed. he corrects, “doesn’t seem like it’s- she’s super thrilled right now.”

the cat’s eyes are wide as it sits in the opening of the carrier. they dart to dean as he crouches down from where he’s standing in the doorway looking at her.

“new environments can be unsettling for a time. she’ll get used to it here soon enough.” cas tells him. “jack volunteered to pick some things up at the pet store for her so that i could get her home and settled in more quickly.”

dean leans his head back and sighs, staring up at the ceiling. “did you give him a spending limit?”

“no, i gave him your cash.” cas deadpans. then, before dean can get up in arms, he adds, “yes, dean, i told him essentials only.”

dean lets his head drop back down so he can look at the cat again. “we’re not putting the litterbox in here.”

cas nods. “of course not, it’s going in our bathroom.”

dean closes his eyes.

“she has to start out in a quiet room. the guest room is lonely and jack’s getting into guitar again, so there’s no other place to put her.” cas explains. “just for a few days, then we can let her explore the house.”

dean opens his eyes again as cas stands up, so he stands to take cas’s hands in his own. he looks into his eyes and says, “i love you, but i am not cleaning cat shit out of a box for you.”

cas snorts and says, “so you’re not kicking her out.”

“no, i’m not kicking the little freak out.” dean sighs, exaggerating it and then pressing a kiss to the corner of cas’s mouth.

***

dean can’t help but smile as jack and cas set up the cat’s essentials- her food and water dishes, her litterbox, her toys, her scratching post, her cat tower with five layers. jack told them very seriously that it was on sale if he bought the litterbox and the package of toys, so he had to get it.

“i used the card, but i can pay you back because i wanted to get it with my own money.” he tells cas.

cas shakes his head. “you don’t have to, jack.”

dean claps a hand on jack’s shoulder and holds his hand out for the screwdriver. “your dad woulda bought it anyways.”

jack smiles and hands the screwdriver over. “do you like her, dean? you guys have matching eyes.”

dean raises his eyebrows. “what?”

“didn’t you see? she has green eyes too.” jack says, turning to scan the room for her so that he can show him.

“i think she’s under the bed, let’s leave her be for now.” cas says. “but he’s right, dean, they’re actually very close.”

dean turns to the in-progress cat tower. “right.”

by the time it’s put together, jack has coaxed phyllis out from under the bed with a feather toy and is keeping her on her toes to chase it. he sits and watches for a moment, and then turns and catches cas looking at him.

cas’s smile widens. “she likes jack.”

“likeable kid.” dean says. he checks the time on his phone and then stands up, and phyllis freezes but doesn’t run. “well- i’m gonna start on dinner.”

jack twitches the feather toy so that phyllis’s eyes lock on it again, and he leads her out of the way. “can i stay here with her?”

“i’ll let you know when we need the table set.” dean says. he brushes his hand over cas’s shoulder on the way out and makes sure the door is closed all the way, so the cat can’t get out.

***

“have you even pet her yet?” dean asks as they get ready to lay down. the tv is on in the background, but dean keeps getting distracted by the shape of the cat tower and having to remind himself that it’s supposed to be there.

“she let me at the shelter.” cas tells him. “she warms up very quickly, so i don’t think it will be long here.”

dean hums in acknowledgement. they settle into bed, cas turning over on his side for a moment to look at dean, and then finally leaning over to drape himself over dean’s chest. the weight of him relaxes dean and he lets out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. he gives it a moment before he says, “i know what you’re doing.”

cas tilts his head to look up from where it rests on dean and says, “what do you mean?”

dean snorts. “the pressure thing. from the book we read for jack.” he remembers reading something about how pressure is supposed to lower your heart rate, and he knows cas knows it works on dean because he does this anytime dean’s had a particularly bad day. “i’m fine, though. do you hear my heart racing?”

“well. i did just bring a cat home without asking- you can’t fault me for checking on you.” cas says, not looking even a little guilty with his ear right over dean’s heart.

dean opens his mouth to reply but stops when he feels  _ something _ shift at the end of the bed, and he sits up before he’s thought it through, jostling cas away from him.

phyllis jumps off the end of the bed and disappears out of sight.

“oh.” dean says, a little awkwardly.

cas chuckles and coaxes dean back down. “she has impeccable timing.”

“she almost got kicked.” dean confesses. “is she allowed on the bed? can you train cats not to do that? she scared the hell outta me.”

“if you kick my cat, you’re sleeping on the couch.” cas warns him. “even if it’s an accident.”

“sorry.” dean says, tightening his arms around cas.

eventually he starts to doze off, and then he feels the cat jump up again. he only startles a little, not even enough to wake cas, who’s already asleep.

dean feels her walk up toward the head of the bed on cas’s side where there’s space, and then they meet eyes. he remembers what cas said about cats blinking, so he does that, and then feels like an idiot. phyllis stares at him and he can practically feel her judging him as she curls up in the empty space next to cas, her eyes still on him.

“quit it.” he whispers.

she continues to stare, until finally dean admits defeat and looks away because he’s  _ not _ going to continue having a staring match with a cat.

***

jack creates a monster the moment he walks into the house with a little grey knit sweater for phyllis, because cas nearly cries when she lets him put it on her, and then he turns to dean and says, “when she lets me hold her again i need you to take a picture.”

jack grins and dean rolls his eyes. “i thought it would look nice on her.” jack stretches out a hand and phyllis glances at it for a moment before bumping her head into it and letting jack pet her.

dean’s only touched her once, partly because the texture unsettled him and partly because she won’t let him, but she lets him get close to her, so he thinks they’re on good terms. he watches cas and jack and phyllis’s little photoshoot, smiling, until phyllis gets tired of them and darts away and steps on him as she goes. “hey!” he calls after her.

“dean.” cas says, and dean already knows the rest of what cas is about to say, but he says it anyways. “don’t yell at her, she was just startled.”

dean scoffs. “she got bored, and she doesn’t like me. it was assault with intent.”

jack snorts. “cas, i think she really has a grudge.”

“maybe if dean made more of an effort with her, she would like him more.” cas shrugs, putting on his most nonchalant expression.

“h- don’t condescend me in front of our kid, he’s impressionable.” dean says, half-annoyed and half-amused.

“you don’t like cats.” cas says, and his tone is back to normal, pointing out the obvious. “she can tell.”

dean looks at him blankly. “she’s a cat. she can’t tell.”

“she’s a lady and she can tell when she’s just being tolerated.” cas says.

“oh my god.” dean drags his hand down his face. “she’s a  _ lady _ ?”

“she has the most dignity out of anyone in this house.” cas says, and dean could swear he was about to turn his nose up as he talked.

jack looks between them as dean struggles to find any words to say that make sense, until he fills the silence instead and says, “well, i’m going to go play guitar for the lady if she’ll let me.”

dean groans and cas laughs as jack leaves the room.

***

it’s too early and the house is too out of caffeine. he’s standing at the stove frying some bacon, half asleep, when phyllis adds to it all and starts  _ yowling _ at his feet.

dean groans. “well, ‘morning to you too, ballsack.”

he feels the glare before cas says anything. sure enough, when he turns around he sees cas in the kitchen entryway holding a bag of groceries, looking maybe the most murderous dean’s seen him since the last time he actually tried to kill him, years ago now. not promising.

phyllis yowls again and dean opens his mouth to defend himself, but cas narrows his eyes. dean closes his mouth.

“no.” cas says. “that’s  _ awful _ .”

“it’s fitting.” dean says as he turns back to break the eye contact and take the last round of bacon out of the pan.

cas loudly picks up the coffee pot and fills it at the sink. “maybe  _ that’s _ why she doesn’t like you, dean. you’re insulting her.”

dean rolls his eyes and cracks some eggs into the bacon grease. “we have a mutual agreement. she leaves me alone and i leave her alone. she’s breaking it, so… ballsack it is.”

there’s a moment of silence, and then phyllis yowls again as dean takes the bacon over to the table.

“...not in front of jack.” cas sighs.

“of course not.” dean agrees, and he thinks it’s over, but then cas pointedly makes his coffee and leaves him to make his own cup, the backstabber.

dean finishes the eggs and brings them to the table too, and when he makes his plate he breaks off the tiniest piece of bacon and ‘drops’ it so phyllis can get it.

cas notices and says, “dean, it’s not healthy for her to eat food like that.”

dean smiles. “accident. and i don’t know why she wants it anyways, when you play personal chef for her.”

“it’s a much healthier diet than any cat food at the store.” cas agrees. “and i don’t want her spoiled, dean, she only gets treats when jack is training her.”

dean nods slowly and decides not to bring up that she cries at him if he’s anywhere near the treats and not giving her one. “is jack still in bed? these eggs aren’t getting any warmer.”

“let him sleep. you know he just got into dice making, so i think he was up late researching how to make molds.” cas says. “i’ll make him eggs if he wants them.”

dean drops another crumb of bacon when cas looks down at his newspaper. kindly, he says, “no, i really think i’d better make them.”

cas looks up at him and they hold each other’s gaze a moment before cas finally says, “they weren’t very good last time i tried, were they?”

dean smiles. “maybe phyllis would eat them.”

on cue, she yowls at his feet again.

“she never yells at  _ you _ .” dean says.

cas leans down to offer his hand out to her. phyllis sniffs it for a moment before bumping it with her cheek, purring. “it’s because i like her, dean.” he pets her and then adds, “and if today is anything to go off, she knows you’re an easy target.”

dean scoffs, even though cas is right. if it makes her stop yelling, what’s a tiny piece of bacon here and there? “i don’t  _ not _ like her.” dean says, because it does kind of make him sound like an asshole if he doesn’t.

cas rolls his eyes. “i’m going to pick her up some sweaters today, if you’d like to come with.”

dean thinks of the leopard print monstrosity that cas brought home last time. “yeah, i think i’d better.”

***

dean’s got one blanket wrapped around his shoulders, and another over his legs. the tv is playing some shark documentary and dean’s ignoring it in favor of his laptop, where he’s scrolling past someone’s life story so he can get to the recipe he wants.

cas calls from the kitchen, “i’m going to the store before i pick up jack, do you want tomato or chicken noodle soup?

“i can make my own soup, cas.” dean calls back, wincing when his head throbs. he finally gets to the ingredients as cas walks in.

“you’re sick, and i would feel bad making you cook.” cas says.

dean rolls his eyes. “i  _ want _ to cook.”

“you slept in until almost eleven, and when you woke up you couldn’t talk.” cas says. “you’re resting.”

“i’ve been resting all day.” dean says. “i’m tired of resting.”

cas smiles a little. “then you can help jack with his homework when we get back.”

dean sighs. “do i get to sit at the table when we do that, at least?”

“we’ll see.” cas reaches over and puts the back of his hand to dean’s forehead and dean closes his eyes. “you still feel warm to me.”

dean feels cas pull away but keeps his eyes closed because it eases his headache, a little. “alright.”

“i’ll be back soon.” cas says, and presses a kiss to the top of dean’s head. “and yes, i’ll drive safe.”

dean smirks and listens to make sure cas is out the door before he pulls the blanket tighter around him. he knows there’s no point in feeling weird about being taken care of, but he can’t help it. he’s about to get up with his blanket and go sit at the table when there’s a little thump at the end of the couch.

he opens his eyes and finds phyllis in the process of unsticking her claw from where it’s caught in the cushion. before dean can sit up she’s free, and then she’s walking on him to sit on the laptop.

“hey- come on, that tab was open for a reason.” he snaps, carefully sliding it out from under her and closing it. she settles onto him and curls up, watching him with her eyes half closed like she’s waiting for a reaction.

“i was going to get up.” he says, and then feels dumb for talking to her like she’s going to understand. “move it, gollum.”

she just blinks at him.

he sighs and considers for a second that he could move her, but she’s warm, and she also has claws so maybe picking her up when she doesn’t want to be isn’t the best plan.

“brat.” he says, and puts a hand out for her to sniff. she does, and nudges forward to touch her nose to his fingertip.

dean sighs and sets his hand down next to her face, and she nudges into it again and purrs.

he closes his eyes again and resigns himself to listening to the tv.

what seems like a minute later, dean hears jack stifling a laugh. it takes him a second to figure out that he must have fallen asleep, and when he opens his eyes he sees that phyllis has too, curled up on his chest now instead of his stomach. he looks up and meets eyes with jack, who very quickly puts his phone behind his back.

“hi, dean.” jack says simply. “do you feel any better?”

“haven’t decided yet.” dean says. “can you come take her so i can get up?”

jack pauses. “well, cas said to leave you alone, so…” he trails off, and then adds, “i’m going to do what he says.”

dean snorts as jack backs out of the room and leaves him trapped.


End file.
